Thursday, April 25, 2024

Eric Hovde: The Ultimate Carpetbagger

Pornstache Carpetbagger

Everyone knows that Eric Hovde, aka Pornstache Carpetbagger, is really a Californian banker.  He lives in Laguna Beach, California and was awarded Citizen of the Year in Orange County for three years running. 

But apparently, old Pornstache is such a carpetbagger that he might not even be from this country.  Take for example, via Heartland Signal, a few days ago when he tried to pretend to be a Wisconsinite by going to the Slinger Speedway.  After giving a short speech of monolistic jingoism - America is great. Yay. - he wanted to lead the crowd into a rousing rendition of the Pledge of Allegiance.  But as soon as he started, you could see his mind blank out and he started looking like a deer caught in the headlights.  And it only got worse from there.

He even got help and he still could get it right!

But wait! There's more! There's always more!

When his totally ineffective spokesperson, Ben Voelkel, tried to do damage control, all he could do was point and yell, "Squirrel!"

Hovde's campaign spokesman, Ben Voelkel, responded that President Joe Biden is also known to stumble over words and phrases, including while on the campaign trail in Wisconsin.

Voelkel added that the media should instead focus on other things: "Families are struggling to afford groceries, terrorists and hundreds of thousands of criminals pour into the country illegally, mortgage rates are almost 8 percent, and leftist anti-Semitic protests rage across college campuses."

I wonder, is Hovde a Russian name, perchance?  I don't know, but given the stilted way he tried to be All American Guy and not being able to recite the pledge even with help, I'm no longer sure Hovde is actually American.

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