Thursday, February 2, 2012

Big Bird Will Be Next

"Is that Big Bird on that grill?!"
State Representative Joel Kleefisch (R-Back of the minivan) apparently missed the news that Wisconsin is still leaking jobs like a sieve, has a stagnant economy and that people are really suffering.

Otherwise, Kleefisch wouldn't be wasting time and taxpayer money to come up with the bird-brained idea of having a hunting season for sandhill cranes.  Kleefisch said that his concern is that the cranes are doing to much damage to farmers' crops, but then reveals his real reason:
"They not only make great table fare, often they are called 'the ribeye of the sky,'" said Rep. Joel Kleefisch, R-Oconomowoc. "With our hunting heritage in this state, we thought we'd look at a sandhill crane hunting season."
Apparently those mourning doves just don't fill him up enough, or maybe their just too much of a challenge for a poor marksman.

Whatever the reason Kleefisch feels that he needs to pass this moronic bill, it's not going to do anything but feed him, according to the experts:
The International Crane Foundation hasn't taken a position on the bill, but Barzen said science shows hunting is not the answer.

"In order to control crop damage by removing cranes from the population, you'd probably have to remove a significant portion of the crane population, and nobody is really proposing to do that," said Barzen.

Instead, Barzen said treating crop seeds can keep cranes away. More than 76,000 acres were treated by Wisconsin farmers last year. Some farmers said that only pushes cranes to other fields, and doesn't control the population. But wildlife experts said cranes won't migrate far and instead will find other food sources.
I think the real reason that Kleefisch wants to do this is to help appeal to the wingnut base in order to save his wife's job. Because if she loses her job, she'll be home all day and all night, lecturing the furniture about abstinence.


  1. Looking at Kleefisch's mug and playing the word association game I came up with "putz".

  2. It's true that they hunt them in states along the midwestern flyways to the west of us. It's true that they're good eatin', I've heard - tastes a little like eagle, a little like whooping crane.

    I think it's an attack on the Wisconsin Eye logo.

  3. Huh, now lookie here people
    Listen to my story
    A little story 'bout a man named Joel
    You know something?
    That poor mountaineer
    They say he barely kept his family fed

    Now, let me tell you
    One day he was shootin'
    Old Joel was shootin' at some food
    When all of a sudden right up from the ground dere
    Well, there came a bubblin' crude

    Oil that is well, maybe you call it black gold or texas tea
    He gonna move next to Mr Walker and be a Tosa hillbilly